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View Full Version : (09.17.09): "What's Happening to Women's Happiness?" (by Marcus Buckingham, PuffPo)


Laura Cereta
09-18-2009, 07:36 AM
Uh... I don't know. PuffPo writes trash about us and then we become unhappy? :thinking:

1969 was an intense, rousing time for women in America. Betty Friedan had published The Feminine Mystique a few years earlier, and had founded the National Organization for Women in 1966. And Gloria Steinem had just published the essay in New York Magazine that clearly separated the modern Women's Movement from other oppressed groups, "After Black Power: Women's Liberation," in which she called for meaningful work, equal pay, and the goal for all women to be freed from the role of only "servicing men and their children."


I doubt she would have guessed that by the early twenty-first century, women would be running the governments of countries as powerful and widespread as Germany and Ireland, Bangladesh and New Zealand, Chile, Mozambique, and Jamaica. Or that the wife of one U.S. president would spend months in 2008 as the national favorite to become president herself and, barely failing in that quest, would become an outspoken Secretary of State, or that the Speaker of the House would be a woman, or that John McCain would choose a moose-hunting, helicopter-riding, crowd-pleasing mother of five as his running mate because she'd stared down oil companies as governor of the tough state of Alaska.

How about education? I'm sure she would have forecast that more women would be completing high school and attending college, but do you think she'd have predicted that during the 2008 school year, 59 percent of all the bachelor's degrees and 61 percent of all the master's degrees would be earned by women, not by men? Or that by 2009, four out of the eight Ivy League universities--Harvard, Brown, Penn and Princeton--would have female presidents?

And work? Again, she would probably have bet that, in the future, more women would be working, but would she have guessed that October will be the first month in which women outnumber men in the workforce, that women would be holding more management and supervisory positions than men, by a margin of 37 percent to 31 percent, that in like-for-like work women and men with the same amount of work experience would be earning the same, and that women's pay would actually be increasing faster than men's? I doubt it.

Yet the biggest surprise would have come if you had asked her just one more question. Given all the evidence of women running corporations and universities, hospitals, media empires, branches of government, army divisions, and countries, do you think women in the future will be happier?

Of course they will be happier, she would have said. With all these opportunities and achievements, how could they not be?

Well, as it turns out, too easily.

First, since 1972, women's overall level of happiness has dropped, both relative to where they were forty years ago, and relative to men. You find this drop in happiness in women regardless of whether they have kids, how many kids they have, how much money they make, how healthy they are, what job they hold, whether they are married, single or divorced, how old they are, or what race they are. (The one and only exception: African-American women are now slightly happier than they were back in 1972, although they remain less happy than African American men.)



And, in case you're wondering, this finding is neither unique to this one study, nor is it unique to the United States. In the last couple of years, the results from six major studies of happiness have been released:

* the United States General Social Survey (46,000 people, between 1972-2007),

* the Virginia Slims Survey of American Women (26,000 people, between 1972-2000),

* the Monitoring the Future survey (430,000 U.S. twelfth graders, between 1976-2005),

* the British Household Panel Study (121,000 people, between 1991-2004),

* the Eurobarometer analysis (636,000 people, between 1973-2002, covering fifteen countries),

* and the International Social Survey Program (97,462 people, between 1991-2001, covering thirty-five developed countries.)


The second discovery is, this: though women begin their lives more fulfilled than men, as they age, they gradually become less happy. Men, in contrast, get happier as they get older.


`"Hey," you might say. "Life's tough. Deal with it." And of course, you'd be right. Life is not designed with anyone's happiness in mind, and it has the disconcerting habit of not rewarding the good as much as we'd expect, of punishing the wicked less vigorously than we'd like, and even, on occasion, of getting the two completely mixed up.

Even so, only the most wasted of cynics would deny that something's got to give. Not only is this "tough life" significantly tougher on women than it is on men, but the advances of the last 40 years were supposed to have changed things for the better. And not just for womankind, but for each individual woman. The hard-won rights, opportunities, and advantages were supposed to have netted women more than just another burdensome role to play--"you at work." They were supposed to have fostered in each woman feelings of fulfillment and happiness, and even, for the special few, the sustained thrill of living of an authentic life.

This hasn't happened. Over the last 40 years or so, life is not trending toward more fulfillment for women; life is, in most ways we can measure, becoming more draining instead.


Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/whats-happening-to-womens_b_289511.html (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/whats-happening-to-womens_b_289511.html)

foxyladi
09-18-2009, 12:35 PM
it.s the bosses job.but dang someones got to do it.:rotfl::rotfl:

sojourner
09-18-2009, 01:09 PM
I think that happiness depends a great deal upon the path in life you choose to follow and how well the outcome agrees with your expectations. Some may have been caught up in the euphoria that the new found freedoms of education and career created and found that they did not meet their expectations. Due to external influences some may have followed a path they may not otherwise have chosen. With these new found freedoms comes pressure to succeed. I don't know too many people that find added happiness in added pressure.

Disclaimer: I am a man. I fully admit I have no real knowledge on what makes women tick and the longer I live the more I realize how little I know. But, I can't imagine a world without them and I am thankful for all the amazing women I have in my life.

Laura Cereta
09-18-2009, 11:29 PM
I think sometimes the amount of multi-tasking leads to prolonged stress. Not only that but women often garner a fair amount of self-esteem and satisfaction in life from relationships and it's easy to become so busy that one unintentionally isolates themselves.

jlynne
09-19-2009, 12:27 AM
I grew up believing that a woman could be anything she wanted to be. I came of age believing that my generation could shatter the glass ceiling, that we could leave behind a world to our daughters and our granddaughters where women were thought to be as capable and as competent as men. Now, I know with an absolute certainty that I was wrong. It will not be my generation that transcends the "b*tch barrier" nor will it be my son's generation. I am not happy about that. I am not happy that so many of the sacrifices that the women of my generation made are proving to be for naught. Nothing like being called an "old dried up c*nt" by young democrats to remind you of how much society values middle-aged or older women.

Am I less happy than my mother was? Absolutely. She had no illusions about making the world a better place so she wasn't disappointed when it didn't happen. I am.

VotingHillary
09-19-2009, 12:57 AM
I think as the still-perceived main caregivers of our families, women are unhappy because we just don't like what we see going on in the world and worry about what kind of world we are leaving for its children.

Just my take as a "woman of a certain" age with friends of a "certain age".

VotingHillary
09-19-2009, 01:10 AM
Nothing like being called an "old dried up c*nt" by young democrats to remind you of how much society values middle-aged or older women.

It's not just that label. It is that the level of respect we paid to our elders and have now EARNED for ourselves is not paid to us.

Example: There was no way in hell me or my cousins would have the audacity to have our aunts do dishes after they cooked a dinner for the extended family. Yet, here I am, still doing the damn dishes because I don't want my parents doing them while my niece and nephews sit on their asses as if we should be honored that they "graced" us with their appearance.

I think especially for those of us middle to slightly past middle age, we wonder when we are going to receive the respect we have earned.

VotingHillary
09-19-2009, 02:08 AM
any comments from the other ladies in the forum? Really interested in your take on this.

Suzan
09-19-2009, 02:44 AM
Well, I guess I'm feeling cynical tonight, but I don't get the sudden interest in women's happiness. Whoever cared about it when the little woman's role was to stay at home, be a good wife and raise her children? Actually that was part of her role, to be happy and cheerful.

Now, it's a big deal? Everybody's worried about women's happiness? Why do I think this is just another way to undermine the achievements of women since the revolution or maybe to show that women can't/won't be happy no matter what.

I predict that most woman would blissed-out-of-their-minds happy if their partners carried their share of the load. And probably, many woman would be much happier if they came with a toggle switch for the guilt.

Yes, I am being too cynical, I'm sure.

VotingHillary
09-19-2009, 02:48 AM
many woman would be much happier if they came with a toggle switch for the guilt.

That's is the crux of it all...in moving forward, we really haven't freed ourselves of the past "women's duties"...we have only added to them.

sojourner
09-19-2009, 03:17 AM
Happiness Wanes As Women Age
By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
New research suggests the difficulty in achieving life goals cause women to end up unhappier than men later in life — even though they start out happier.

The study, authored by Anke Plagnol of the University of Cambridge, and Richard Easterlin of the University of Southern California is forthcoming in the Journal of Happiness Studies.

The investigation is the first to use nationally representative data spanning several decades to examine the role of unfulfilled desires in a person’s sense of well-being.

As the researchers explain, expectations of success may vary among those raised in different generations (i.e., an economic depression). Data sets from a range of time periods may also have different demographic compositions.

In their analysis, the researchers control for birth cohort and demographic characteristics such as race and education. They find that women are, on average, happier than men in early adulthood – but the glow wears off with time. Specifically, after the age of 48, men’s overall happiness exceeds women’s happiness.

These gender patterns of overall happiness correlate to patterns in two significant aspects of life satisfaction: family and finances.
Source (http://psychcentral.com/news/2008/07/30/happiness-wanes-as-women-age/2668.html)

Suzan
09-19-2009, 03:50 AM
I think that happiness depends a great deal upon the path in life you choose to follow and how well the outcome agrees with your expectations. Some may have been caught up in the euphoria that the new found freedoms of education and career created and found that they did not meet their expectations. Due to external influences some may have followed a path they may not otherwise have chosen. With these new found freedoms comes pressure to succeed. I don't know too many people that find added happiness in added pressure.

Disclaimer: I am a man. I fully admit I have no real knowledge on what makes women tick and the longer I live the more I realize how little I know. But, I can't imagine a world without them and I am thankful for all the amazing women I have in my life.
Nice post. :thumbsup: